Communicating with Parents
From the desk of Carol C…
Recently I’ve seen some good relationships become strained due to miscommunication or a complete lack of communicating. One friend didn’t understand the decisions of the other friend and lashed out at her. A couple I know had some heated moments between the two of them because they didn’t communicate their feelings adequately enough to each other. What does all of this have to do with a blog about education? Simply this: When communication between people is sparse, rare, or nonexistent, problems arise in the relationship. The same happens to our relationships with parents when communication is rare, sparse, or nonexistent. It’s crucial that we make sure we are sharing information with parents frequently so the relationship with them doesn’t become strained unnecessarily.
So what does this communication with parents look like? It starts with teacher webpages. These pages are a relatively simple way to keep parents informed about what your class is studying, any changes in the schedule, and due dates for major projects (or minor ones). Any information that keeps parents on top of what their kids are doing is more than helpful. This isn’t spoon feeding. It’s just a way to keep parents in the loop, so they can support their child’s learning. If parents aren’t reading your webpage, then email them the link each time you update it.
Take advantage of parent/teacher conferences especially at the beginning of the school year. Even if you have 120 students, spending a few minutes with each of their parents will make a huge impact on your relationship with your students and their attitude towards school. When you learn a bit more about your students, they will be more than a name in a grade book much earlier in the year.
Send as many positive messages to parents as you can manage. Make these messages as specific as possible. None of the “Greg is a good student” or “Greg worked hard”. An email, a quick handwritten message, or a positive note written in a student’s notebook goes a long way when you are establishing and strengthening your bond with parents and your students. Knowing that you see their child’s strengths and care about them enough to write a note will make the sting of bad news down the road hurt a little less. Regardless of age, everybody likes to hear positive things about themselves and to be bragged on. Parents like hearing good things about their children more than they like breathing. Aim for sending home a positive note to each student’s parents two times a grading period at least.
Make sure that parents know the best way to reach you (probably email) if they have questions about homework or any other part of school. Just as important is responding quickly to their queries. Emails should be answered before leaving for the day. Many parents are intimidated by teachers in secondary grades as they are insecure about their own learning. Answering parents’ questions and concerns promptly makes them feel that they and their children are important.
Keep parents informed by sending home interim reports. This way the report card shouldn’t be a surprise for them. The idea that “they (parents) should already know” the grade doesn’t hold water as we all “should know” many things but don’t put the pieces together until it’s too late. Some school systems require an online grade book which parents can log into and see their children’s grades in any area. If this is the case in your situation, make sure to keep it up-to-date.
When all of your efforts at keeping parents informed haven’t seemed to work for a few and they are upset and request a conference, schedule an appointment with them as soon as possible. This lets them know that their concerns are important to you. At the start of the conference make sure to sit and listen first before sharing your information with them. Parents, many times, just need to vent their frustrations before being able to listen to someone else.
We all need to work as partners with our students’ parents. When parents feel included they are more supportive of us and of their children’s education. It takes time to keep the lines of communication open on our part. We have many students and parents have a few children. Nonetheless the time put into productive communication pays huge dividends. Parents have a better understanding of the core curriculum and so are able to provide more valuable support for their children. Also both you and the parents can focus on the behavioral and social needs of their children as well. In this time of what seems like constant testing we’ve got to remember that our goal is to teach the whole child and to reach this goal we must involve and show families how much we value them.